Letter to Aryan

My Dear Aryan,

Just some days after your first birthday, your parents started giving you, what they lovingly called, 'potty training'. They must have

struggled a lot in the process. And you must have wondered what this was all about. After a lot of protests on your part, it must

have dawned on you that all this was to suit their convenience. 'Enough is enough', they must have said in private, after the

mounting expenditure on diapers and a good deal of wiping and cleaning (which you must have enjoyed, I am sure), before they

lifted you towards that Special Purpose Room. There is no way how you felt while they did lot of cajoling and saying 'easy, easy'.

But ultimately, when nature did the rest, you seemed to have been terribly relieved of both pressures – from inside and outside.

Aryan, I am not there to have a man-to-man talk with you on this subject. But believe me, on that day, you have won your freedom.

If any one cares to ask me: 'What is the greatest achievement of this Advanced Civilization?' I would, without any hesitation, point

towards this Room. No, I am not referring to the large tub, or the electronic plumbing or the marble floor in that Room: just the

Room. The Room, where one can freely go, without seeking any permission from any person and do what one likes to do: Read,

Write, Think, and even Sleep. One must, of course, make some occasional noises and use the flush. People outside could bang the

door, shout at you but cannot compel you to come out before you decide to do so.

Who has invented this Room? It must be a man, no doubt. This reminds me of a story from Uttar Pradesh. The State Government

built private toilets and brought the water to the houses in a village, by constructing a huge dam and laying long pipe lines. But,

then, on one fine morning, it found that all the pipe lines were broken and the toilets were used by the villagers for storing fodder and

dung-cakes. After a lot of questioning, the village women admitted that it was they who did all that breakage. The new home-

delivered water and the closed toilets robbed them of the pleasure of going to the river, and gossiping, chattering, singing, and

entertaining themselves while they performed their ritual of washing, bathing and cleansing.

So, this Room must be the Man's invention, Aryan! Enjoy fully this gift of Man to man. You will appreciate it more and more as you

grow. My generation had equipped the Room with books. You will enrich it by installing in it a nice music system, TV and the

computer with X-box. The great potty day was your Independence Day. Celebrate it every year!

Lovingly yours,
Grand-Dada

September 5, 2008

Our 45th Wedding Anniversary

Thanks, Rajani!

Thanks for not saying “No”, when your father asked about me, some 46 years ago, although you did want to do so!! Who in all her senses would marry a bespectacled teacher, with a paltry salary of Rs. 280 and, being the eldest, taking all the responsibility of educating and marrying his 5 siblings? And, that too, with a prospect of staying in a three-room place in a congested locality of Pune?

Further, you were coming from a relatively richer family and you had all the chances of finding a better husband.

But the days in the 60’s were different. No girl can go against the wishes of her parents. If the parents have found the boy suitable and qualified to marry you, how dare you say No?

Some girls still did, but thank God, you didn’t utter a single word of protest.

This entire action or rather ‘inaction’ on your part made the 26th June 1963 happen to me. And my life changed for ever, for better – for me, for my parents, my brothers and sisters, for our two handsome sons, for their most talented and gorgeous wives and their sweet children.

And you also seem to have enjoyed your life wedded to me and to all of them.

I would now like to believe in rebirth. Then I will be able to ask you to be my life partner again.

Don’t say ‘No’, then. Please.

Yours still in love,

Arun

26th June 2008